saudade.

Monday, November 19, 2007

argh. I'm on medication again.
infection. thus leading to sore throat, blocked nose and a cough.
don't even noe whether i can play 2morrow.
cos my mum is like not very happy with me.

weights was hiong today.
cos we did tt push up thing with like 6kg.
can die lor.
and some of the others are like doing 8kg.
bian tai. haha.
but seriously, i feel tt we've all become stronger in a sense
like when we first started, we had prob even with 4kg but now we're like pushing hard
going to heavier weights.
like how ethel is doing 105? pounds for leg extension.
which is like almost her weight.

ahh! miss loo is coming back 2morrow.
stress stress stress.
heard tt she's in a bad mood.
haiz, hope i can perform if i play 2morrow.

haven eaten anything today
excpet for the small piece of cake
clau/hiongster, im not dieting, LOL.
i jus dun feel like eating.
mayb its cos of my sore throat bah.

wanted to lunch with them today but after getting off 61
din feel well so headed home first.
sorry peeps.
anw, other half was SO nice to be concerned abt me. haha.
i think when i come back frm africa, i'll be as ____ as her.
haha. if u get the catch.

i miss the things we used to do together.
the rides home, the "debates", the discussions, the encouragment
but eveything seemed to hv changed within a blink of the eye.
to me, you were like a brother. someone who really cared
but now, i feel SO superficial when i see you.
like as if we're acting like we noe each other, or we bother.
but in actual fact,
WE DON'T.
at least not you.
i thought mayb its jus cos you're busy with __ stuff.
but its been such a long time.
when was the last time we talked?
4 months back?
perhaps so long tt we dun even rmb.
when ppl tell me
"ly, i thought you and him gd frens?"
all i can say is,
ya, we WERE.
and you've no idea how tt feels.
its hurts like nobody's business.
mayb we were never close bah.
like you never really cared.
but i know tt i do
everything tt i said, i meant it.
the feeling im having now is like a person whom you were gd frens with
suddenly jus becomes distant.
and you jus fade into the background.
but you dun hv time anymore.
tts what i realised.
you only hv time for ___
guess tts what happens when we dun work together.
it's alright, i'll get over it. SOON.
mayb you'll never see this. cos you dun read blogs.
you hv NO TIME. isn't is?
the reason im sad is cos i thought we were gd frens.
and frens are very impt to me.
hah. forget it.
it doesn't matter anymore.
this is the last time im gonna be sad abt this.
but i jus gotta say this.
LCK, i miss our FRIENDSHIP.