Sunday, April 26, 2009
i love you so much,but you don't even know it.it kills me to see how everything has moved on.you, the world, our friends and even myself.everytime i see you the wound i've tried so hard to healjust splits open again, effortlessly.but you don't seem to notice, neither does it bother you.a couple more days and it'll be labour day.i don't know how long more before i'll forget that labour day i spent with you.it wasn't anything outta the blue yet it's so etched in my bed of memories.so special, and sometimes how i wish i could just reach out and take it back.all of it.he knows, he knows i'm holding back.and it's so godamned unfair for him.he doesn't press me to tell him anything,but i know he knows.i feel haunted, yes i do.everything, reminds me of you.unconciously i catch myself thinking out loud,"hey, we've done that before too"i try to mask it or to laugh it off, but at times i'm too slow,sometimes he catches what's on my mind.he only pretends not to see it but i know it hurts him.and it hurts me too.how much longer can this pretending go on for.i don't wanna do this to him, i don't.but i can't do it any other way either.
why, why isn't it going away.and the worst thing is, i still feel for you.i get through the week thinking that i've become strong enough,that nothing, even the sight of you can bring me down.but the opposite appears to be true everytime i see you;the sight of you knocks the wind out of me.seeing you laugh and happy with your friendsonly shows how weak i've become.there you are over everything,but i'm not.i know i'm not,at least not entirely.people tell me time heals wound.growing up, i've realised that it's not true.time only plays with the flaws of the human mind,forgetfulness.over time we forget, that's how the pain lessens.but time doesn't, and will never, erase those wounds.sometimes hate rears its ugly head right in my face;i don't know how i've allowed myself to crumble to this state,all because of a single person.nothing, not even my parents' divorce, or the countless times i've gone through scarring arguments,has ever done this to me.but you have.i'm speechless.he makes me laugh, he brightens up my day,he's there for me.and all these only serves to crush me even more, knowing that i can't do the same.i can't say yes, i can't.how can i, tell me,how can i.
maybe it's plain stupidity;everytime i reach this door,i can't find the key to open it.because the key lies in you,it lies in me gett over you.
damn, i hate admitting all this.i need to get over myself.and hopefully that'll let me get over,you.
Sunday, April 26, 2009
i love you so much,but you don't even know it.it kills me to see how everything has moved on.you, the world, our friends and even myself.everytime i see you the wound i've tried so hard to healjust splits open again, effortlessly.but you don't seem to notice, neither does it bother you.a couple more days and it'll be labour day.i don't know how long more before i'll forget that labour day i spent with you.it wasn't anything outta the blue yet it's so etched in my bed of memories.so special, and sometimes how i wish i could just reach out and take it back.all of it.he knows, he knows i'm holding back.and it's so godamned unfair for him.he doesn't press me to tell him anything,but i know he knows.i feel haunted, yes i do.everything, reminds me of you.unconciously i catch myself thinking out loud,"hey, we've done that before too"i try to mask it or to laugh it off, but at times i'm too slow,sometimes he catches what's on my mind.he only pretends not to see it but i know it hurts him.and it hurts me too.how much longer can this pretending go on for.i don't wanna do this to him, i don't.but i can't do it any other way either.
why, why isn't it going away.and the worst thing is, i still feel for you.i get through the week thinking that i've become strong enough,that nothing, even the sight of you can bring me down.but the opposite appears to be true everytime i see you;the sight of you knocks the wind out of me.seeing you laugh and happy with your friendsonly shows how weak i've become.there you are over everything,but i'm not.i know i'm not,at least not entirely.people tell me time heals wound.growing up, i've realised that it's not true.time only plays with the flaws of the human mind,forgetfulness.over time we forget, that's how the pain lessens.but time doesn't, and will never, erase those wounds.sometimes hate rears its ugly head right in my face;i don't know how i've allowed myself to crumble to this state,all because of a single person.nothing, not even my parents' divorce, or the countless times i've gone through scarring arguments,has ever done this to me.but you have.i'm speechless.he makes me laugh, he brightens up my day,he's there for me.and all these only serves to crush me even more, knowing that i can't do the same.i can't say yes, i can't.how can i, tell me,how can i.
maybe it's plain stupidity;everytime i reach this door,i can't find the key to open it.because the key lies in you,it lies in me gett over you.
damn, i hate admitting all this.i need to get over myself.and hopefully that'll let me get over,you.
Biography
MUSE <3
LEEYIN
I love vintage & unique beautiful postcards. I dream, and think a lot.
I don't like people who make promises that they can't keep because somehow, that really breaks my heart.
I'm really gullible so please don't break my heart.
MUSIC
Fall for Anything, Breakeven, Before The Worst, Talk You Down - The script
Dismantle Repair, A Day Late, Paperthin Hymn - Anberlin
Fireflies, Vanilla Twilight, Cave In - Owl City
Bounce - The Cab
Carry Out - Timbaland feat. Justin Timberlake
Glee Season 1 albums
