saudade.

Saturday, July 05, 2008

SAY IT ISN'T SO.

there're just some days when i just feel extremely down.
and there's like no one to pull me up.
mayb it's time that i counted on myself.
i've never felt more alone than this before.
at least when he was here, reality wasn't that harsh.
but now with him gone, everything just sucks.
and now that he's got someone, i guess it hurts even more.
and it's not only abt him, it's abt the ppl around me.
just feel like idk who i can trust and who are the double faced ppl.
ppl whom i thought were trustworthy can actually be the ones who stabs me right in the back.
you told me that everyone should have the equal amount of trust given in the beginning
but i just can't do it now.
with everything that has happened, i just find it almost impossible to trust anyone anymore.
i feel like a toy that gets thrown around.
when you're down then i'm of use, if not, i'm just casted away.
the feeling just sucks.
it was the same with him i guess
the entire time i was just there cos his friends were busy.
but now, i'm not needed anymore.
that line has been crossed, till a point that i don't have anymore faith in people.
i've tried but time and time again, i've been let down.
so honestly tell me, why should i try again?
to try and risk getting hurt.
what's the point?
what am i trying to achieve?
i try to help and get called nasty stuff behind my back,
what is this?!
i feel so sick and tired of being disappointed.
i'm gonna stop trying.