saudade.

Wednesday, May 20, 2009

i'm gonna stand in front of the world and not be ashamed of who i am.
even if you don't like it.

ytd was fantastic! :)
hahaha.
went out with SY to watch Angels and Demons
it was... nice i guess?
i don't think anything i say will be accurate cause i didn't read the book.
but i really thought that Robert Langdon was too smart,
a bit unbelievable eh.

chatted with SY once i met her, and omg
she was awesome to talk to, really.
i never thought i'll be so open with her
(although i'm kinda open all the time)
she's not judgmental, and i really liked that.
plus plus plus, i found out something so JAW DROPPING.
and i can't say it, but oh well.
hahaha.

got back my chinese paper 2 tdy.
i didn't manage to pass :X
so i'm really keeping my fingers crossed and hoping that my paper 1 will pass.

N read my blog
and commented that i was reading too much, LOL.

ML approached me tdy and asked me something really outta the blue.
still thinking about it, and i have to give her a reply by tomorrow
grr.
i hate making rushed decisions.

V is back from his backpacking!
idk why i feel happy but i just do.
hahaha.
nowadays it seems like if either J, D or V doesn't come for ycg,
i'll feel as though it's kinda incomplete.
weird huh.
anyway, that aside, his trip sounded ultimately cool!
wish i could do that too, but that'll probably in like 5 years' time?
till then man.

i swear M holds the best parties in the entire world!
he has an awesome house and the best company, hah.
reached home at four-ish in the morning?
went there with JF, N and a couple of other guys
and their 'dates' of course.
but i wouldn't call them dates, if you know what i mean.
shan't elaborate much but now the song Circus is replaying in my mind.
and all thanks to N and his girl toy, tsktsk.
the party was fan-fcukingly-tastic :)

i've come to accept that there're many sides to a person.
and if you really claim to be somebody's friend,
"accept them for who they are"
easier said than done huh.
there're so many people that come to you,
suck up to you only when you've got something they want.
typical eh.
but that's just BS to me.
it repulses me, to the max.

i'm quite sick of being judged.
really.
i mean like, hey sure i'm different from you.
but that doesn't make me the bad person right.
my standards are different from yours,
so whatcha gonna do about it?
i'm me and you're you.
i'm not even asking you to change a hair on your head.
so why the hell do you view me through tainted glass?

sure maybe i've changed.
but then again,
maybe this is who i've been all this time.
you just never noticed cause you NEVER bothered.
i'm gonna tell you right now that i'm not a goody-two-shoes
you've made me up to be in your mind.
i'm NOT.
face it.
this is who i am.

i'm just leeyin.
take or leave it.