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Wednesday, February 03, 2010





i find that more times than not, i'm very much at conflict within myself. torn between what i want and what i know i should want. i go about everyday with this subconcious psychological warfare, which probably accounts for why i seem so distracted sometimes. what really sucks about the whole situation is that i can't seem to put it into words. it's as though it's absolutely formless, i reach out and try to grab hold of it - only to realize that my efforts are in vain.

all these leaves me confused, i try to make sense of it, but it never amounts to anything.

my heart is often engulfed in a whole spectrum of emotions, more than i can handle, but my heart never seems to learn. it's amazing how my heart and my mind seem to be two entirely separate entities, yet it isn't.
i try to not feel for something, for someone. sometimes i succeed, sometimes i don't.

events, issues and people break my heart so very often. people tell me, it's a part of life. but what they don't realize is that even though it is a part of life, it doesn't make it any easier to endure.

truth doesn't make reality any less harsh.

but somehow when all these shit happens,
i think of you and everything's okay.