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Friday, October 19, 2007

no idea y but I'm like emo-ing nowadays.
unknowingly.
it's like I just dun feel like talking.
mayb cos everyone's so busy.
or it's just that my existence doesn't matter anymore.
I'll jus like stare into space.
and for that moment, I'll just stop thinkin.
Mayb its jus my emo period now.
but suddenly it jus seems like everyone whom I thought would be there are not there anymore.

not good enough.
I know i shouldn't be thinking tt way
But i can't help it.
everyone seems so good it makes me feel awful.
I smile cos i believe that a smile wil make things better.
but sometimes, the tears are the "awesomest truth"

i jus suddenly wanted to migrate.
That silly thought jus came to me.
no idea y i hv this thought but ya, it jus came

i thought that i belonged with you ppl.
but i guess i was wrong.
i think mayb i've been disillusioning myself all this time
cos what i thought was,
was never the case.
i thought i had found my place here
but it jus seems like i've been wrong.
mayb we'll never be as close as i thought we'll be.
cos we're not each other's first piority.
sometimes i jus wanna cry
cos i just feel so lost.
but its ok
cos God will always be there for me

i left early today cos i felt so...
distanced?
i felt so____ that it jus felt weird to stay
mayb the prob lies with me
im jus screwing everything
i just feel
detached.
just imagine
what if one day everything u thought u know
suddenly became uncertain to you.
how would you feel?
that's the way i feel now.






















why can't you use ur heart to listen?
can't you hear the fear in my voice
that i'm afraid i cant make it to UNI.
but no, u had to say
" y do u tink u cant make it when u haven even tried?'
"i think you shouldn't hang out with ppl who tells u tt UNI is tough"
but face it, to get into UNI is indeed tough.
that's all Im saying
I've never said tt i dun wanna go UNI.
but u assumed it.
the way u talk abt ppl who din give their best and din get into UNI
makes me wanna throw up
what's wrong with not having a UNI degree?
if you have done ur best and given it ur best shot,
isn't being what you are enough?
u say that as long as a person has given it his/her best shot
if dun get in also nvm.
then i ask you what i dun manage to get into UNi.
what would you do?
u say u wont scold me or be disappointed.
but you now what?
ur face says a different story.
i know that u are not prejudiced against ppl hu dun hv degree.
I'm jus trying to ask you to hear what im saying.
what I'm REALLY saying
if only u could understand mum.